We're all in this together (no, really)

Matt Hughes, rest in peace.

Earlier this morning, Andrew Hayward, editor for Mac|Life and games writer-for-higher, delivered the sad news that another freelancer named Matt Hughes took his own life within the past few days. Matt was an up-and-coming writer who wrote with passion and charmed his friends and colleagues in the industry, and his passing shocked nearly everyone in my Twitter feed who knew or had worked with him. I never knew Matt, but it's plain that he was well-liked by those who did, and that we are worse off because of his absence.

The games writing community responded to the news of Matt's passing by remembering their interactions with him, and urging anyone with thoughts of hurting themselves to reach out to others and talk about it. Russ Pitts of Polygon also mentioned looking into a charity for geeks suffering from depression, and responses was overwhelmingly supportive. I hate that it takes the death of a talented young man like Matt for the games writing industry to stop fighting with each other and work together, but my heart was warmed by the sight of so much positive emotion and support both for Matt's immediate family and friends, and for everyone in the industry who has ever had problems with anxiety or depression.

I have never been diagnosed with depression or any anxiety-related illness, so I'm not sure how much credence I can lend to the discussion about depression among the geek and games writing community. I have dealt with self-esteem and anxiety issues for most of my teen and young adult life, though, and have had my share of nights when I feel absolutely worthless and want to crawl into bed, never to wake up if only it would dull the horrible sting of my own flaws. Statistics exist regarding the number of persons in the United States living with depression, but numbers don't mean a damn thing when you're scraping the bottom of an emotional well with a half-filled whiskey bottle.

Which is why I was so grateful to see everyone banding together to talk about their own issues in combating depression or mental illness. Not being friends with anyone in my immediate social circle with comparable emotional tics, I've always felt isolated in dealing with my absurd issues of self-worth, and reading comments from other games writers that, basically, answered my own insecurities with genuine emotional care made me feel so much better about myself. I thought I was struggling with depression because I'm having so much trouble trying to enter the business. Turns out that other, already-established writers are struggling with it, too.

Thank you everyone in the games writing industry for your kind words, and for letting me know that I'm not the only one that feels absurdly down from time to time. My thoughts and prayers go out to Matt and his family, and to those who knew him. We lost a talented, wonderful young man, and I hope that we never have to lose another soul to depression before we realize how tight the games writing community is, and how willing they are to help, if only we ask.